Why We Need To Be Forgiving Moms

21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”

22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.

23 “Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24 As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand bags of gold was brought to him. 25 Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.

26 “At this the servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ 27 The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.

28 “But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred silver coins. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded.

29 “His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.’

30 “But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 31 When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened.

32 “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33 Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ 34 In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.

35 “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”

Matthew 18:21-35

Forgiveness is not natural. Our instinct as sinful humans is to hold on to grudges and bring up past offenses long after they’ve occurred. Pride trumps humility and we’d rather end relationships than admit we were wrong. Children grow up in broken homes because parents are unwilling to forgive one another. Parents only see their adult children on holidays because no one wants to be the first to request forgiveness after a falling out. Siblings don’t talk for years because that’s easier than forgiving an offense. Momma, let’s fight to rid our families of the foothold Satan has on us and our loved ones. We cannot let a lack of forgiveness permeate our legacy. We need to learn to be forgiving moms.

First and foremost, we are commanded to be forgiving moms.

Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

Colossians 3:13

Christ has forgiven us. He sets the example and we must follow suit. Just like the servant in Matthew 18, we accept Jesus’ compassionate forgiveness but are quick to forget that incredible mercy when it’s our turn to extend forgiveness to another. We somehow feel “owed” and the payment for their wrongdoing is the grudge to which we cling. Especially when it comes to our children.

“I carried you for nine months, spent 36 hours in labor, spent hundreds of thousands of dollars raising you for 18 years and THIS is how you repay me? I’m ticked and I’m going to be for a long time.”

Our worldly, selfish hearts make this our justification. The Holy Spirit has wiser counsel. There is nothing that someone could ever do to us that Jesus has not already forgiven. Every sin, past, present, and future nailed Jesus on the cross. He didn’t hesitate to forgive us for the horrendous death and separation from God that we caused him to suffer. So why are we too proud to forgive our children for [insert current sin problem here]? In the verses we read in Matthew, Jesus tells us to forgive seventy-seven times. That doesn’t mean keep a count and when you’ve reached seventy-seven you are done. The point is to say that the forgiveness Christ extends to us is unconditional and he will never stop forgiving us. We are to model him and extend that same powerful grace to others. We need to be forgiving moms.

To be clear, Biblical forgiveness should never be used as justification for staying in a physically or verbally abusive relationship with anyone. Forgiveness goes hand-in-hand with repentance, which means there needs to be a conscious, intentional effort to turn away from the offensive behavior. You can forgive but also move away and move on from people who habitually hurt you.

We can find it easier to forgive our children because, well, they are our children. (Honestly though, I find myself wanted to hold a grudge over my toddlers head – how dare you bite me!?!?!) But we are also commanded to forgive other people’s children… and adults. Leaving a legacy that reflects Christ doesn’t just mean that we forgive certain people. We have to forgive everyone. Our children see how we act in and outside the home. If they see us holding a grudge against our family, friends, or neighbor, it puts a chip in our story.

How We Can Be Forgiving Moms

Spend time in prayer today asking God to reveal people or situations that you need to forgive. If God reveals anything to you, make an effort today or tomorrow to make it right. Call, email, text, send a letter and ask for forgiveness. It will be hard. It will be freeing. No matter how the other person reacts, doing this is a true reflection of Christ.

Make this a regular practice. Pray about it often. Memorize the verses in this devotional. Be intentional about forgiving others.

READ MORE DEVOTIONALS ABOUT LEAVING YOUR MOM LEGACY

This is a devotional except from Leaving Your Mom Legacy: A 30-Day Devotional On Reflecting Christ In Motherhood, available on Amazon in paperback and Kindle. Order yours today! 

For more one day devotionals from Messy Tired Love, click here. To learn more about these devotionals for Christian moms, click here.